Moments of Doubt
Now Thomas (also known as Didymus), one of the Twelve, was not with the disciples when Jesus came. So the other disciples told him, “We have seen the Lord!” But he said to them, “Unless I see the nail marks in his hands and put my finger where the nails were, and put my hand into his side, I will not believe.”
John 20:24-25 (NIV)
Jesus met Thomas at his point of need. He showed Thomas the evidence Thomas needed to remove all doubt. Kneeling down and filled with wonder at the Lord’s proof, Thomas said, “My Lord, my God!” Thomas received the evidence he needed and he responded with worship and belief.
Why must doubt be considered such a bad thing? Seeking what we do not know can help us journey forward. After all, it’s how we grow. Faith is found in doubtful moments, in times when we cannot believe.
You’re not less of a Christian because you’re nursing doubts. It’s a barometer, a prognosis about where you are in your faith right now. Jesus is essentially saying to Thomas, “Thomas, I don’t want you walking around disbelieving the resurrection, because without the belief of the resurrection, there could be no salvation. So I need you to believe that I am in fact resurrected. Therefore come here, touch Me, and see if I’m real.” And when he does, Thomas’s doubts have to step back, and Thomas says, “Oh my God and my Master.”
And that’s where many of us are today. We’re upset with ourselves because we’re thinking, “How can I sit here wondering if God can make a way when, for so long, He’s proven Himself faithful? But these doubts, they just keep confusing and clouding my spiritual conversation.”
Concerning those thoughts, Jesus says, “It’s all right. I know you have them. You’re human. And I know you have doubts. That’s okay. That’s why I’m going to stand here with My wounds and let you touch Me—because I need you to know that I am real.”
Your doubts are not always the absence of faith. Sometimes they’re just an indication that faith needs to be pushed to the next level.
The One Jesus Loves
Peter turned and saw that the disciple whom Jesus loved was following them.
John 21:20 (NIV)
Ralph Waldo Emerson described greatness by saying, “A great man [or woman] is always willing to be little.” Jesus told us that the path of greatness is paved with servanthood, and that, if you want to be great, you must be a servant.
That makes John not only a strong disciple of Jesus, but it makes him a really great man. John is an admirable example of modesty for each one of us. It’s surprising just how much, in the book that bears his name, John intentionally turns the spotlight away from himself. His name means “to whom the Lord is gracious” or “whom the Lord has graciously given.”
From the time John becomes a disciple, he reveals deep, gifted, and spiritual potential. He must learn, however, to fight some of his inner ambitions. He has to learn how to surrender to a higher calling of God in his life until he reaches a place of maturity where he stops seeking seats and stations and status and selection. Instead, he surrenders to being shaped by spirituality that empowers him to offer surrender, service, sacrifice, and selflessness.
The book that bears his name portrays John as a loyal and faithful follower of Jesus—so much so that he becomes a part of Jesus’ inner circle. He was privileged to witness Jesus’ raising of the daughter of Jairus from the dead. He witnessed Jesus’ transfiguration on the mountain. He bore witness to Jesus’ agony in the Garden of Gethsemane. But interestingly enough, all John ever wrote about himself is that he is one whom the Lord loved.
My friend, are you willing to set aside fame, ambition, attention, notoriety, acclaim, recognition, glory, and renown to be known simply as “the one whom Jesus loves”?
The Key of Promise
For no matter how many promises God has made, they are “Yes” in Christ. And so through him the “Amen” is spoken by us to the glory of God.
2 Corinthians 1:20 (NIV)
I don’t know if when you grew up, you were made to read John Bunyan’s Pilgrim’s Progress like I was. It’s one of the Christian classics and is a must-read for believers.
Two characters, Christian and Hopeful, are walking the King’s Highway to the Celestial City. The path, once smooth and easy, becomes rough and hard. Then they come to an attractive place called By-path Meadow. They climb over a fence into the meadow and the new path becomes easy again, but only for a short time.
Soon the new path becomes rugged and steep. A terrible storm breaks out overhead. Exhausted by the effort to make their continued journey, Christian and Hopeful lie down and fall asleep. Suddenly, they are awakened by the owner of the meadow: the Giant of Despair.
The Giant of Despair drags them to Doubting Castle and throws them into an inner dungeon, where he taunts them and beats them and starves them. Hurt and confused, Christian and Hopeful slide into despair.
Finally, Christian and Hopeful begin to pray. Then Christian remembers that he’s carrying in his pocket a key called Promise. Quickly he uses his Key of Promise to open the door of the dungeon and then the gate of the castle, and freedom greets them on the other side. Soon they find themselves walking again up the King’s Highway.
My friend, there is a key in your pocket right now called Promise. All of God’s promises are “Yes” and “Amen” for the believer who is facing obstacles and troubles and circumstances that have you moaning in your own personal dungeon of despair.
Use the key. Find the promises of Scripture that apply to your situation and leverage those promises to propel you forward to freedom.
A New Kind of Person
God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind.
2 Timothy 1:7 (NKJV)
As we journey through life, we find ourselves constantly swinging on the pendulum between the past and the future, between shame and potential, between regret and promise. It can be unsettling to let go of who we’ve been and embrace the new person we’re becoming, but that is exactly what the Lord invites us to do. He calls us to trust in Him and to let go of our past mistakes and regrets, and to step out of our comfort zone into the unknown.
The Lord’s call is not just an invitation to manage our lives based on our past experiences, but an invitation to let His presence and power transform us. He promises to give us a new spirit, one of power, love, and a sound mind. He promises to bless us and empower us to push boundaries and test limits, to become a new kind of person, one who is unaffected by the struggles of the past.
In this moment, we have the opportunity to let go of our past mistakes and regrets and embrace the new person we are becoming. The Lord is with us every step of the way, guiding us and transforming us. He is the one who will bring us through the difficult times and bless us with the power to overcome.
We must choose: will we continue to manage our lives based on our past experiences, or will we let the Lord transform us and lead us on a new faith adventure?
The choice is yours. Trust the Lord, who has begun a good work in you, and will complete it until the day of Christ Jesus. Let Him guide you to become a new kind of person, one strengthened by Christ’s promise to transform you.
God Can Use Your Doubt
“Be merciful to those who doubt.”
Jude 1:22 (NIV)
Don’t settle for internal contradiction because you fear whether Jesus can deal with or minister to your doubts. I’m here to tell you, He’ll step into your doubt and prove to you that He is as powerful as you suspect He is. He’ll prove to you that He can do exceedingly abundantly above all that you can ask or think. And He wants to.
He’s letting doubts raise questions in your life that only He can answer. He’s letting doubts object to things in your life that only His sovereignty can overrule. The Lord is letting your doubts walk you into places and spaces where you never thought Jesus would meet you. And the Lord knows that when you get there, the doubt He ministers to will eventuate in the deepening of your spiritual conviction.
One of my favorite authors, Brian McLaren, says, “Doubt is like a spiritual drought, a starless night of the soul, a low tide when faith seems to have retreated forever. Nearly all of us experience these dry, dark, difficult times when God doesn’t seem real and it’s hard to keep going, much less growing. Sometimes these low tides of faith are connected with events … the death of a loved one, a broken relationship, the loss of a job, a prolonged illness, questions raised by a book or professor. But sometimes they seem to come out of nowhere; it’s sunny and bright outside, but inside you feel dark, cloudy, gray, empty.”
McLaren continues, “As a pastor, I have to deal with matters of faith and doubt on a daily basis. But it’s not just other people’s faith struggles I have to face; I experience my own high and low tides of faith even in the midst of an active ministry. Through it all I have learned that doubt can be a doorway to spiritual growth.”
Don’t surrender to internal contradictions because you feel you can’t own your faith and your doubts at the same time. Let doubt be a catalyst that moves you closer to Jesus.
